SOMEWHERE ALONG THE NEW JERSEY TURNPIKE, WHERE IT SMELLS LIKE SEWER — Rutgers is a dump.

It is the dried deodorant chunk in America’s armpit, the unsightly sore on an unsightly state, New Jersey, that’s often referred to without its prefix because there’s nothing New about this decrepit hole.

(Case in point: You don’t hear New York called ‘York’ or New Hampshire, ‘Hampshire’ or even New Mexico, ‘Mexico.”)

Rutgers coaches are creeps like Kevin Bannon, who once made his men’s basketball players strip naked to shoot free throws and run wind sprints. Its notable athletic alumni are scrubs like the Tampa Bay Buccaneers’ Marco Battaglia and the Milwaukee Brewers’ Eric Young.

Rutgers is and always will be a Big East bottom-feeder, content in its pathetic ways.

You probably think that way. I used to, too.

And why not?

The Scarlet Knights’ football team hasn’t had a winning season since 1992. Over the last 10 seasons, its Big East record is 13-55-1. Sure, the men’s basketball team went 18-13 this past season, but the Rutgers hoopsters haven’t won 20 games since 1982-83 and haven’t had an All-American in 17 years. Their NCAA Tournament drought dates back to 1991.

Simply put: Rutgers sucks.

Go ahead, make that assumption. I used to.

I also used to ignore the fact that Rutgers supports 30 varsity teams, the most of the 15 Big East schools, and spends about $3.2 million on athletics, fifth-most in the conference. To put it in perspective, Syracuse spends over $3.8 million on 15 varsity sports.

Rutgers supports programs like fencing and women’s gymnastics just because, in the words of Joe Quinlan, RU’s senior associate athletic director: ‘Those are prominent high school sports in New Jersey. People look for us to provide opportunities to compete.’

Rutgers hasn’t cut an athletic program since it eliminated lightweight football in 1990. Syracuse, by contrast, has cut two — men’s gymnastics and wrestling — since 1997.

Still ready to rip Rutgers?

Then consider that on the Piscataway campus, there are some of the finest athletic facilities in the Northeast.

The Louis Brown Athletic Center, best known as the RAC, is the fearsome home court of the RU basketball team. The Scarlet Knights were 15-2 at the 8,500-seat arena this past season.

The Sonny Werblin Recreation Center, splashing grounds for the swimming and diving teams, has an Olympic-size pool (SU doesn’t), three sand volleyball courts and six racquetball courts.

Yurcak (pronounced YER-sack) Field, the school’s 5,000-seat soccer and lacrosse stadium, has hosted Big East tournament soccer games and dwarfs SU’s 1,500-seat soccer stadium.

Then there’s “The Bubble,” the nation’s largest air-supported indoor structure; the Hale Center, headquarters to the RU athletic program, whose $9 million expansion is set to finish this year; and an 18-hole golf course.

‘Those are all things that are going to help all our programs,’ Quinlan said. ‘No matter how good your facilities are, you always need to go ahead and keep an eye on things you can do better.’

That’s exactly the mission Quinlan and Director of Athletics Bob Mulcahy undertook when they arrived four years ago. They wanted to change your perception.

The first coach Mulcahy brought in was Glenn Crooks to head the women’s soccer program. Mulcahy and Crooks decided the way to improve the RU athletic program was to convince Jersey kids to stay home.

Crooks, who coached high school soccer in New Jersey for 10 years, and his entire coaching staff are from the Garden State and well respected within the prep ranks. Last year, seven of the eight recruits Crooks brought in were from Jersey.

Last fall, after four straight losing seasons, Crooks’ Scarlet Knights — with 25 of 30 players from Jersey — were nationally ranked.

Crooks knows, though, that all of his success doesn’t mean squat to the typical American sports fan, who still sees Rutgers as a football and men’s basketball abyss.

The Rutgers football team was 2-9 last season under first-year coach Greg Schiano, who pledged to recruit more Jersey kids. Over the winter, the men’s basketball team flirted with success under rookie head coach Gary Waters but lost in the first round of the NIT to Yale.

‘Instead of the ESPN commentators making jokes about the football team, perhaps it can go in another direction,’ Crooks said. ‘I don’t honestly know how much it holds us back, but it certainly can make us more attractive if those two programs are strong.’

Though RU basketball finished just 8-8 in conference play, most deemed Waters’ first year — in which his squad upset Syracuse and Connecticut at the RAC — a success. And that’s how football and men’s basketball are going to be measured at Rutgers for the foreseeable future: by a handful of upset wins.

Fair or not, Rutgers won’t be expected to compete on the national level like Syracuse. So, how is it ever going to overcome the can’t-win Rutgers stigma?

Apparently, for all the money they put into it, the folks up top are willing to be patient.

‘(Schiano and Waters) have, in very short order, made great strides in enhancing the image and improving the results of this athletic program,’ Quinlan said. ‘For people to overlook that is shortsighted and not very fair-minded.’

Maybe. But will this I-think-I-can, I-think-I-can attitude really stand up for the long haul?

There are plenty of people who’d snicker at the mention of Rutgers and national title in the same breath.

I brought up national title shots with Quinlan. He paused, thought long and hard and said, ‘If we didn’t think we could do something with it, then we ought to go ahead and not be at this level. For us to have minimal expectations, it’s not fair to our staff and university.’

It might not matter for you. You hadn’t thought squat of Rutgers in forever anyway. Then again, maybe it doesn’t stink so much after all.

Darryl Slater’s column appears Tuesdays in The Daily Orange. E-mail him at dpslater@syr.edu.

Published on April 15, 2002 at 12:00 pm