Support systems can help college students navigate multi-faceted grief
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When people hear the word grief, they think of the painful emotions that follow the death of a loved one. But grief is more complex than sadness. It shapes a person’s identity, influences relationships and evolves across every stage of life.
Approximately one in 12 children in the United States experience the death of a parent or sibling by age 18, and the number of bereaved young adults increases significantly by age 25.
I lost my dad at 10-years-old. Experiencing a significant loss during childhood taught me how isolating grief can be. I felt different from my peers and didn’t have the words to explain what I was experiencing.
Growing older showed me that grief doesn’t disappear — it changes. Some days, unexpected sadness can appear as a memory or a sign from the person who died.
Grief is difficult for college students because it occurs while we’re managing academic responsibilities, social expectations and personal growth. Studies show college students experiencing prolonged grief deal significantly more with depression, anxiety and feeling hopeless, sadness and anger.
Grief can’t be ignored. With so many children and young adults losing loved ones, colleges need to realize grief is something they must face.
Normalizing conversations about loss and strengthening mental health resources will ensure students don’t suffer in silence.
“Loss and grief are not something that can be measured by time,” said Jaylan Albert Fisch, a Syracuse University freshman who lost his dad two years ago.
Grief is often ignored because people are uncomfortable discussing it. But avoiding grief doesn’t stop it from happening. For grieving students, explaining how we feel can be difficult.
Grieving isn’t an excuse; it’s the way we're forced to live our lives, and that’s just as hard as moving through life on its own.Amber Fulop, Columnist
“Unless you’ve been through it, you’re not going to understand,” Fisch said.
Some students feel misunderstood, making it difficult for them to seek support. A 2022 study found that about 30% of bereaved college students needed more support, often hesitating to reach out because they feared being a burden or that their problems weren’t important enough.
Colleges must do more than provide resources. They must create support groups where grieving students can come together and feel less alone in their grief. As Fisch explains, “Having a few people that can understand how you’re feeling is vital for your mental health.”
Currently, SU students can seek support through Hendricks Chapel and the Barnes Center at The Arch. These resources are valuable, but students need more support beyond grief counseling. Students should be able to connect with peers who have experienced similar losses through support groups, workshops or clubs.
“We wouldn’t have to explain anything to one another because we all understand,” Fisch said.
A year after my dad died, I attended a grief camp called Experience Camps, where I felt the power of community while connecting with others who understand grief. Later, I joined its Youth Advisory Board and helped create Grief Sucks, a website supporting teenagers navigating grief. These experiences taught me that people don’t need their grief fixed — they need their pain validated and heard.
Although resources on campus exist, not every student is comfortable going to counseling, and it may not meet their needs. The stigma around grief must be eliminated.
“There’s no maximum amount of time you should be grieving, and there’s no minimum amount of time you should be grieving,” Fisch said
Grieving isn’t an excuse; it’s the way we’re forced to live our lives, and that’s just as hard as moving through life on its own.
Healing happens when students use available resources, connect with others who understand and allow themselves to grieve. Students who haven’t experienced loss can also help by learning how to show up for a friend. Grief can be a lonely journey, but when colleges recognize its impact on mental health, they become places where students feel safe instead of carrying the weight alone.
Amber Fulop is a freshman majoring in journalism. She can be reached at afulop@syr.edu.
